Before we begin
I have already written a best-seller
Things that could go wrong tonight.
I wrote chapters in advance
preoccupied with the chance
that I might speak out of turn
and learn what it means
to make a first time the last time
My mind was divided
when it came to the conclusion
and in my confusion
I wrote ‘to be continued’
though I do not expect to write a sequel.
Perhaps I could write
how it all went to shit,
from the candle lit dinner
to the bottomless pit
of despair that I enter
as a nervous presenter
when she asks me what I’m like.
Then words become mazes,
and I’m lost in the abyss,
and she stands and says goodbye
but without a goodbye kiss
because I’m thinking of the things
I never said and never did.
The rules my mind created
and the things that they forbid
And perhaps I’ll write a sequel,
Call it ‘screw ups, volume two’
and I’ll write about the stupid things
that I’m about to do.
If you’ve ever had anxiety in some form you’ll know what it means to be terrified of the consequences of every action you make from day to day. I hope this helps to highlight the impact of anxiety on the minds of those who suffer from it